Friends,
I feel like I need to update you on what's been going on in my life over the past week. As some of you know I was offered a job at a PR company here in the city last Thursday. Needless to say I jumped at the offer and I couldn't be more excited about this opportunity. To be honest, it's sometimes hard to talk about, as in I feel a little bit guilty. It's not that I feel like I don't deserve this--I do, but so many people need and deserve jobs right now. I realize how lucky I am, and I just want to say those of you working in jobs you don't love (that was me a week ago), it will get better. It will. You just have to keep at it, but at the same time you can't beat yourself up over it. I told my mom the Sunday before I found out about this job that I was going to cool my heels in the search until after the first of the year. And four days later my phone rang. Life is so funny like that. And it's proof that you can only have so much control over what happens. Once you accept where you are, you can make an effort to get to where you want to be.
I'm keeping my retail job to work on the weekends through Christmas and maybe a few weekends a month after that. I'm doing this for a few reasons: first, I really like some of the people I work with--they're good, genuine people. And second, this job humbles me almost every day. It's a reminder to me to never take anything too seriously and to always treat people with respect. Sounds like an easy lesson, but you'd be surprised at some of the people I encounter on a day to day basis.
I'm super excited about my new job because it is totally an area that I'm really interested in and a place where I could do really well. I'm not putting any pressure on myself though--I'm taking it one step at a time. Who knows where this could go. For right now I'm content with working hard, enjoying my workplace, and taking it as it comes.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
My Friend Ishmael
One of the things that I really enjoy about New York is that everyone has a different story. Most of the people that I encounter are not from New York originally, but something drove them here--and they are trying to make their way chasing that dream. So, I ask most anyone why they're here. And if the person seems willing I'll ask them a zillion questions about their life here--where they live, when they moved, when they graduated, etc etc etc.
My friend Ishmael has rocked my boat a little.
Ishmael is a 59 year old man who works 10 hours a day 6 days a week to support his wife and 5 kids that live in Western Africa. And he is one of the kindest people I've ever met. Ishmael has lived in New York City for 6 years working to support his family. Puts things into perspective a little bit, doesn't it? Of course we hear these stories, but when you encounter someone doing it, it's a whole new ball game. Ishmael is fluent in French so he keeps me on my toes. We chat about his family, the cultural differences, and I tell him about how my friend Samantha is studying abroad this year. I tell him of her experiences, which I gather through her blog and emails. He digests and gives me his opinions. Ishmael travels back to Africa once a year for about a month, and he's planning on making the trip this November, but this time only for two weeks . When I asked him why he told me that he needed to be back here making money for his family. Kills you, doesn't it? It makes me realize how lucky I am that Sam is in the US and that I can call him whenever I want.
I think what jolts me is the fact that Ishmael is so vulnerable about the whole thing. He tells it like it is and only hopes that one day he'll be able to return. I appreciate all that he has told me about the culture and lifestyle of Western Africa. I find it fascinating. I appreciate every bit that he tells me.
Ishmael has taught me the lesson we all learned a long time ago--you never know what another person is going through. We don't. We can't open up their noggin and jump in. Let's make an effort to be kind to each other--someone is always fighting a harder battle.
My friend Ishmael has rocked my boat a little.
Ishmael is a 59 year old man who works 10 hours a day 6 days a week to support his wife and 5 kids that live in Western Africa. And he is one of the kindest people I've ever met. Ishmael has lived in New York City for 6 years working to support his family. Puts things into perspective a little bit, doesn't it? Of course we hear these stories, but when you encounter someone doing it, it's a whole new ball game. Ishmael is fluent in French so he keeps me on my toes. We chat about his family, the cultural differences, and I tell him about how my friend Samantha is studying abroad this year. I tell him of her experiences, which I gather through her blog and emails. He digests and gives me his opinions. Ishmael travels back to Africa once a year for about a month, and he's planning on making the trip this November, but this time only for two weeks . When I asked him why he told me that he needed to be back here making money for his family. Kills you, doesn't it? It makes me realize how lucky I am that Sam is in the US and that I can call him whenever I want.
I think what jolts me is the fact that Ishmael is so vulnerable about the whole thing. He tells it like it is and only hopes that one day he'll be able to return. I appreciate all that he has told me about the culture and lifestyle of Western Africa. I find it fascinating. I appreciate every bit that he tells me.
Ishmael has taught me the lesson we all learned a long time ago--you never know what another person is going through. We don't. We can't open up their noggin and jump in. Let's make an effort to be kind to each other--someone is always fighting a harder battle.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
When You Get Down To It
Sam was here this weekend...and the weekend was, well, perfect. I picked him up from the airport on Thursday afternoon and we spent a long weekend enjoying each other's company--talking--literally talking for hours. We did other things too--went for walks in Central Park, went down to SoHo, were out and about, but we couldn't stop the chatter! Sam makes me laugh harder than anyone I know and it was so good to just see him! It was such a luxury to just be able to tell him something right away instead of texting it or trying to remember to tell him about it at the end of the day. Super thankful for him and the happiness that he brings to my life. One night we spent dancing in my kitchen to James Taylor (Mom, we toasted to you) and it was magic. What this weekend reminded me of was something my parents have always preached to me: it doesn't get any better than this. And, it's the truth. When you get down to it, it doesn't get any better than the moments where you are with the ones you love. For my family, that's around the dinner table listening to my brother go on and on and on and on about something while my parents and I just nod our heads and agree. And with Sam, it was this weekend as a whole...or dancing to James Taylor in my kitchen or even just sitting with him on the couch while we watched a movie.
My first day back at work after my long weekend all of my co-workers first asked where I was and when I told them that my boyfriend had visited they asked what we did. And the answers couldn't have been more boring, but the truth is that Sam and I don't need all sorts of entertainment because we are just as content to sit down and talk with each other. He's interesting, intelligent, and cracks me up.
Today at work this woman came in and we were having a conversation about a million things, but somewhere in there we got to talking about this organization that she created: Woman Deliver. It's super cool and I encourage you to check it out: www.womendeliver.org/
Also, I am thinking about selling jewelry on www.etsy.com. Check out their website--it's super cute and I'm excited about the idea (just trying to get it all in order). I'll keep you posted!
Sorry for the gushy post, but that's where I am right now. Getting down to what matters. Who matters. I hope that you connect with those people. Tell them how amazing they are and how much you love them. Be proud of them and encourage them to follow their heart...the truth is, they can never hear it too much and it's probably time that they hear it again.
Be well and be good to each other. Make it start with you.
My first day back at work after my long weekend all of my co-workers first asked where I was and when I told them that my boyfriend had visited they asked what we did. And the answers couldn't have been more boring, but the truth is that Sam and I don't need all sorts of entertainment because we are just as content to sit down and talk with each other. He's interesting, intelligent, and cracks me up.
Today at work this woman came in and we were having a conversation about a million things, but somewhere in there we got to talking about this organization that she created: Woman Deliver. It's super cool and I encourage you to check it out: www.womendeliver.org/
Also, I am thinking about selling jewelry on www.etsy.com. Check out their website--it's super cute and I'm excited about the idea (just trying to get it all in order). I'll keep you posted!
Sorry for the gushy post, but that's where I am right now. Getting down to what matters. Who matters. I hope that you connect with those people. Tell them how amazing they are and how much you love them. Be proud of them and encourage them to follow their heart...the truth is, they can never hear it too much and it's probably time that they hear it again.
Be well and be good to each other. Make it start with you.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
One Of Those Days
Do you ever have one of those days where it all seems to click? Things just come easy. I feel like some people live their whole lives this way, while I on the other hand cherish days like this. For me, it consisted of not waiting for the subway this morning, being early to work, and just clipping right through the day. I had decided a few days ago that I was going to treat myself to a pedicure today. It's something my mom taught me, and I think it was a really good lesson. A pedicure? Yes. But the act of treating yourself every once in awhile. On a bad day her cure is a new lipstick (or lip gloss as I prefer), and it really does make your day so much better. But sometimes you just have to do something for yourself for no reason at all. Well, today was that day for me. I've been working my little heart out lately. And although I'm not complaining (seriously, I'm not), I'm exhausted! So...having this to look forward to has gotten me through the weekend and this week.
Usually on one of these days where it all seems to click I have one of those serendipitous days where the clouds part and I connect with someone who rattles my cage a little and reminds me to be present and living each day...
...and that also happened today. While having this amazing pedicure.
The woman zipped in and sat down right next to me. She chose a color that frankly, I judged a little. It's no longer summer--it's time for those rich fall colors and she had some bright poppy pink polish. A summer staple in my book...but in the first week of October? Go for something dark! It's fun! Anyway, she got herself situated and turned to me and struck up a conversation. I'll admit, I was a little shocked. While normally this wouldn't have phased me, I've found that people in New York don't feel the same. And so I've kept my chit chat with subway strangers and people on the street to a minimum. Not this lady. And so we talked and talked and talked. This woman started her own fabric company 3 years ago and just signed with D & D...apparently a big wig in NYC. She told me about how it started out of a need to cover a chair for her daughter and just exploded into this whole thing. Her story was inspiring and she was so humble (my favorite part). I walked away from that pedicure with a book added to my list and, more importantly, a reminder to take the time to talk to people. Let's be honest: what does it hurt us? And at the end of the day we're all working toward something. Why not encourage each other in their endeavor?
So a big thanks to Mrs. F--thank you for reminding me just how much a warm smile and a hello can brighten someone's day. And thank you for reminding me to listen to my soul and to always be willing to try something new--who knows where it will lead?
Usually on one of these days where it all seems to click I have one of those serendipitous days where the clouds part and I connect with someone who rattles my cage a little and reminds me to be present and living each day...
...and that also happened today. While having this amazing pedicure.
The woman zipped in and sat down right next to me. She chose a color that frankly, I judged a little. It's no longer summer--it's time for those rich fall colors and she had some bright poppy pink polish. A summer staple in my book...but in the first week of October? Go for something dark! It's fun! Anyway, she got herself situated and turned to me and struck up a conversation. I'll admit, I was a little shocked. While normally this wouldn't have phased me, I've found that people in New York don't feel the same. And so I've kept my chit chat with subway strangers and people on the street to a minimum. Not this lady. And so we talked and talked and talked. This woman started her own fabric company 3 years ago and just signed with D & D...apparently a big wig in NYC. She told me about how it started out of a need to cover a chair for her daughter and just exploded into this whole thing. Her story was inspiring and she was so humble (my favorite part). I walked away from that pedicure with a book added to my list and, more importantly, a reminder to take the time to talk to people. Let's be honest: what does it hurt us? And at the end of the day we're all working toward something. Why not encourage each other in their endeavor?
So a big thanks to Mrs. F--thank you for reminding me just how much a warm smile and a hello can brighten someone's day. And thank you for reminding me to listen to my soul and to always be willing to try something new--who knows where it will lead?
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
A House of Friendship
One of the hardest things about living in New York is being far from some of my closest friends. I miss their energy on a daily basis--something I am certain I took advantage of when I saw these people all day every single day.
I've been thinking a lot about that word--friend--what it really is and how precious they are to a person's life. And when I think about it, I think about a house. So much effort goes into building a house, from the blueprint to the last detail. The foundation must be laid, the house designed just right, and the location is key. When you walk into an old house in particular, you can't help but take in the weight of it. There is a fullness that is unlike any other. So much work has gone into this house and through many years it has stood the test of time. It has survived heavy thunderstorms and winters that you thought would never end. This house protected you and kept you safe. But...you've done your part too. A lot of work has gone into this house to keep it in shape because you cannot help wear and tear.
True friendship is like this. Time, effort, and love go into it. It will never be perfect, and things will happen that make you worry it won't make it, but even after the harshest storm, there it stands. Strong. Solid. Humbled by the storm
I think that we never stop learning. And time and time again this is proven to me. Just when I think I have it, whatever it really is, figured out something happens to make me come back to the beginning and evaluate again. I appreciate this practice because I feel like it helps us strip away the excess and helps us get to the core.
The same goes for your family too. They are your home. As my parents always say--family is all you've got. So go forth and build and remember that a solid house can weather any storm.
I've been thinking a lot about that word--friend--what it really is and how precious they are to a person's life. And when I think about it, I think about a house. So much effort goes into building a house, from the blueprint to the last detail. The foundation must be laid, the house designed just right, and the location is key. When you walk into an old house in particular, you can't help but take in the weight of it. There is a fullness that is unlike any other. So much work has gone into this house and through many years it has stood the test of time. It has survived heavy thunderstorms and winters that you thought would never end. This house protected you and kept you safe. But...you've done your part too. A lot of work has gone into this house to keep it in shape because you cannot help wear and tear.
True friendship is like this. Time, effort, and love go into it. It will never be perfect, and things will happen that make you worry it won't make it, but even after the harshest storm, there it stands. Strong. Solid. Humbled by the storm
I think that we never stop learning. And time and time again this is proven to me. Just when I think I have it, whatever it really is, figured out something happens to make me come back to the beginning and evaluate again. I appreciate this practice because I feel like it helps us strip away the excess and helps us get to the core.
The same goes for your family too. They are your home. As my parents always say--family is all you've got. So go forth and build and remember that a solid house can weather any storm.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
The Shoe That Fits
I spent Labor Day weekend in North Carolina celebrating my one year anniversary with Sam and my birthday. The weekend was perfect. Getting to spend time with Sam was incredible. And seeing friends was such a treat. It's my first time being out of the city since I moved here. And since I've been back I have been going over each moment over and over in my head. The people, the places, the smells, the sights. Every activity. Every moment. The lifestyle of living in a city where the common denominator of transportation is a car in which you decide when you go and how you go about getting from point A to point B. And when I go over all the things that most people pass by each day my heart overflows.
Working in retail in New York City is the most soul sucking job on the planet. It challenges my faith in humanity some days because I am just aghast at how one person can treat another. And so I have vowed to be the most friendly; the one who is always smiling--trying to provide an example so that we start to treat each other with a bit more respect. And I don't set an example in a rude way, or in one that I hope to be recognized. Rather, I would just hope that my vow for blind kindness is infectious because we never know what the other person is really going through.
These days I'm interested in finding which shoe fits--a harder task than I might have first thought. I have always given my all and invested in the experiences around me. And I continue to do that. And although I appreciate all of the love and support from so many people around me near and far, I am learning that the only person I can listen to is myself because everyone is always going to have a different opinion. And when I need help or input I will ask because sometimes two heads are better than one. And on that note let me just say that I do hope you only keep the people around who want the best for you, even if selfishly it might not be the best for them.
So here's to you and your closet of shoes. Who knows which one will be the perfect fit...but if you never try it on how will you ever know?
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
A Bittersweet Life
I've been thinking a lot lately about the idea of bittersweet. As you all know, Shauna Niequist just released her book, Bittersweet. Excellent is an understatement. But the book has really taken my world and flipped it a little. This passage from her books sums up why:
"The idea of bittersweet is changing the way I live, unraveling and re-weaving the way I understand life. Bittersweet is the idea that in all things there is both something broken and something beautiful, that there is a sliver of lightness on even the darkest of nights, a shadow of hope in every heartbreak, and that rejoicing is no less rich when it contains a splinter of sadness.
Bittersweet is the practice of believing that we really do need both the bitter and the sweet, and that a life of nothing but sweetness rots your teeth and your soul. Bitter is what makes us strong, what forces us to push through, what helps us earn the lines on our faces and the calluses on our hands. Sweet is nice enough, but bittersweet is beautiful, nuanced, full of depth and complexity. Bittersweet is courageous, gutsy, earthy."
As I have read, reread, and read again through this book I can't help but see how true these words are. When I look at my life, the things that brought me the most happiness came out of bittersweet circumstances. Because it was through growth that life came. It was the practice of sucking it up and moving forward on rough days that I realized my strength. Shauna is right, a life of sweetness rots your soul. The bitter can be so hard and cut right through you on dark days, but if you can find it in yourself to move forward the satisfaction is priceless, and the reward that much sweeter.
I'm okay with still learning. I'm okay with not knowing all the answers. I feel like so many people just want to have it figured out. I'm not there. I'm not one of them. I choose to take my life by each day. Sucking every last bit of goodness that I can out of it. On bad days when I'm making my list of 5 things that I'm thankful for I am able to sit back and remind myself that even on rough days good things happen. But on those sweet days when I could make a list of 15 things that I'm thankful for, I sit back and smile with a heart so full. And there's the payoff of a sweet full life.
Wherever you are in your life right now take a moment to appreciate that place. Even if you think that where you are is dark and lonely. I promise you, you're not alone. Hang on. Keep going. You're one day closer to getting out of the cave you feel you're stuck in. And if you're in a place right now where life is sweet take a moment to reflect and appreciate this exact moment. Because there will come a day when hard stuff comes at you--it's life, but remember where you are now and how full that place can be.
"So this is the work I'm doing now, and the work I invite you into: when life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate. And when life is bitter, say thank you and grow."
"The idea of bittersweet is changing the way I live, unraveling and re-weaving the way I understand life. Bittersweet is the idea that in all things there is both something broken and something beautiful, that there is a sliver of lightness on even the darkest of nights, a shadow of hope in every heartbreak, and that rejoicing is no less rich when it contains a splinter of sadness.
Bittersweet is the practice of believing that we really do need both the bitter and the sweet, and that a life of nothing but sweetness rots your teeth and your soul. Bitter is what makes us strong, what forces us to push through, what helps us earn the lines on our faces and the calluses on our hands. Sweet is nice enough, but bittersweet is beautiful, nuanced, full of depth and complexity. Bittersweet is courageous, gutsy, earthy."
As I have read, reread, and read again through this book I can't help but see how true these words are. When I look at my life, the things that brought me the most happiness came out of bittersweet circumstances. Because it was through growth that life came. It was the practice of sucking it up and moving forward on rough days that I realized my strength. Shauna is right, a life of sweetness rots your soul. The bitter can be so hard and cut right through you on dark days, but if you can find it in yourself to move forward the satisfaction is priceless, and the reward that much sweeter.
I'm okay with still learning. I'm okay with not knowing all the answers. I feel like so many people just want to have it figured out. I'm not there. I'm not one of them. I choose to take my life by each day. Sucking every last bit of goodness that I can out of it. On bad days when I'm making my list of 5 things that I'm thankful for I am able to sit back and remind myself that even on rough days good things happen. But on those sweet days when I could make a list of 15 things that I'm thankful for, I sit back and smile with a heart so full. And there's the payoff of a sweet full life.
Wherever you are in your life right now take a moment to appreciate that place. Even if you think that where you are is dark and lonely. I promise you, you're not alone. Hang on. Keep going. You're one day closer to getting out of the cave you feel you're stuck in. And if you're in a place right now where life is sweet take a moment to reflect and appreciate this exact moment. Because there will come a day when hard stuff comes at you--it's life, but remember where you are now and how full that place can be.
"So this is the work I'm doing now, and the work I invite you into: when life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate. And when life is bitter, say thank you and grow."
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